


the man who sleeps with a machete is a fool every night but one (this is not that night)

by Ford_Ye_Fiji



Series: Whumptober 2020 [12]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Number Five | The Boy Gets A Hug, Number Five | The Boy Has Issues, Number Five | The Boy Needs A Hug, Number Five | The Boy has PTSD, Obnoxiously long title? Check, Stressed Number Five | The Boy, i guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-18
Updated: 2020-10-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:00:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27093205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ford_Ye_Fiji/pseuds/Ford_Ye_Fiji
Summary: Day 18: ParanoiaFive is supposed to be getting some much needed sleep...
Series: Whumptober 2020 [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1947877
Comments: 14
Kudos: 159
Collections: Whumptober 2020





	the man who sleeps with a machete is a fool every night but one (this is not that night)

Five's eyes widened as he peered around the corner, the hallways of the house narrowing, the darkness pulling at his eyes, murky and endless. Enemies could be lurking around every corner, waiting to kill him. The noises that had awoken him were most definitely intruders. There was no doubt about it. Someone was sneaking around the house. He could still hear the floorboards creaking. 

Was it the Commission? He wouldn’t be surprised. He had never trusted Herb and Dot to keep their word. This was obviously their inevitable betrayal. They were coming for him. They were coming for his family. 

If there was just one in here, there had to be more outside. He would have to do this quickly and quietly. Then maybe he could rouse Diego and Vanya to help with the rest. Diego, because he was quiet and always willing to fight and Vanya, because he trusted her and her powers were ideally suited for large scale enemies. 

Five crept down the corridor, heart his throat, breath frozen in his lungs, eyes wide and wild, hair tousled from sleep. 

The floor creaked, down below, further away. Towards the kitchen. 

He waited, feet bare against the carpet before he called upon his powers, appearing just down the hallway from the kitchen with an inaudible pop and a flash of blue and white. He waited, wincing at the light his powers had made, hoping that the assassin hadn’t noticed. 

They hadn’t. 

He couldn’t help the grin. The Commission should’ve thought twice before coming after his family again. He would burn them to the ground and raze their offices now that they had declared open war. 

Five crept to the doorway, waiting, hearing the assassin shuffle. He had to do this fast. Quick and quiet or else his family would die, again. 

He waited, breathing in and out, trying to dispel the grogginess of sleep. He knew he shouldn’t have slept, but the others had insisted, saying he couldn’t just "stay up for three straight days" and that it "wasn’t healthy." Well, this went to show exactly why he shouldn’t sleep. As soon as he let his guard down, they pounced. 

Another shuffle, the clank of a pot and Five lunged, pushing through space seamlessly, spitting himself out onto the back of the intruder, which was smaller than he’d expected. There was a shriek, feminine, as Five hissed and then- a wave of energy, throwing him against the wall, something cracking in his chest. Five snarled, vanishing as the dark figure turned. 

He popped up beside one of the drawers, grabbing a butter knife and disappearing as the intruder whirled around. 

Five appeared behind them, twirling the handle in his hands, ready to strike. He didn’t know why they weren’t calling for backup. Was this not the Commission? If so, who was it then? Was it some psycho like Harold Jenkins? An affiliate from the old days? An enemy of Reginald’s? He didn’t like unknown third parties. 

The figure turned, asking quietly, "...Five? Was that you?" 

If the voice hadn’t clued him in, the glow of white eyes in the darkness did. 

Five blinked, confused, " _Vanya?_ "

He watched her slump, "Oh thank God, Five what happened?" 

Five took a step back, "I- I-“ 

She shook her head, "Wait, I can’t see anything. Let me get the light." 

The kitchen lights turned on, blinding Five who rubbed at his eyes, brows furrowing and lips turning downwards as he tried to recover his sight, not letting go of the butter knife until he actually saw his sister. 

By the time he had blinked the black spots out of his vision, he found that it was, indeed, Vanya. She looked awfully concerned, clothes mussed and hair disheveled, her eyes still glowing. 

Five glanced around the room, “Vanya, I think someone else is in the house.”

Vanya blinked, brows furrowing she took him in. Five was completely unaware of how wild he looked, knife in hand and heart hammering as he moved around the table, “I checked all the doors before bed and locked all the windows, but someone must’ve come in while I was sleeping. I heard them. I thought it was you, but clearly it wasn’t.” He frowned apologetically, “Sorry about that, Vanya.”

Vanya eyed him and then the door before asking, “Do you… do that every night?”

Five nodded, peering around the corner of the doorway, “Usually. The rest of the night I patrol.” He glared at the hallway leading up to the bedrooms, “But Allison insisted that I sleep. And now the Commission is here.”

Vanya asked quietly, “The Commission?” 

Five nodded, “I don’t know who else it would be. I _knew_ they were up to something. Getting rid of them couldn’t be that easy.” 

Vanya bit her lip, clearly worried. Five sighed, “Look, don’t worry Vanya. We can take care of them.” 

Vanya shook her head, “Five… it’s not that… no one else is in the house, Five. I _promise_ you.” 

Five glared at her, “What?” 

The glow of Vanya’s eyes receded, “Five, we’re okay. We’re alone. There’s nothing to fight here, alright?” 

Five frowned, “But- I _can’t-_ there _was!_ ” 

Vanya took his hand, gently easing the butter knife out of his fingers, “I understand, Five. You’ve been on edge for so long. But you’re safe here. You can sleep. It’s just me.” 

Five glanced around, “No, no- I- I’m not _crazy-_ “ 

Vanya smiled softly, “No, you’re not. You’re _tired_.” She gestured to the doorway, “I’ll help you double check, Five, but I can promise you that you’re safe.” 

Five’s lips thinned, glancing from her to the doorway. 

He slumped, “...Okay.” 

Vanya nodded, “Well? Let’s go then.” 

Five’s eyes narrowed, “We’re going to do this right though.”

She smiled softly, “Of course.” 

Five eyed her again before deciding to trust her, creeping carefully down the hall in a familiar circuit. Vanya followed, mimicking his quiet movements. And well, if at the end of it, they were too sleepy to return to their rooms, and if, of course, they just happened to fall asleep on the couches, well, that was just a happy accident. 

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is here: https://ford-ye-fiji.tumblr.com/


End file.
